Paul Thomas Gilkerson

What am I going to do without my father?

He passed away on Monday, July 29, 2008 from an aortic rupture due to complications from renal failure. He was 70 years old, the best man I have ever known, and my hero. He had lived ever so gracefully, these past 18 years, with the heart of another hero after successfully undergoing a heart transplant in 1990. And all of us who loved him have been grateful for every single day since.

There is a quietness around me that I simply cannot describe after losing him. I'm not sure if the stillness has to do with the silence of his voice or if it is simply because there is now a huge un-fillable void in my life now without him. Simply put, I miss his presence.

And my mother. I am so worried about her. They were married for 50 years this past December and he is the only man she has ever known. It's up to me now to take care of her and I plan to spoil her rotten as she is the best woman I know. I'm blessed to be their child.

And so, to my father - Daddy - your baby girl loves you and misses you from the depths of her soul. But, mother and I will be with you forever one day and we'll become 'Wee Three' once again. In the meantime, you go on down to that dock that Stacy described, have a few cold beers with Paul Jenkins & Daddy Max, say hi to Grammies, Grampies, Aunt Gwen, DD, and Richie, pet Bucky and keep watch for me and Mom.

I love you Daddy.

Update

I already placed the following in a comment...

Thanks everyone for your sweet comments. Well, I spoke to the Drs yesterday and am actually encouraged. Bottom line is his heart's good, but his liver and kidneys are compromised, so the physicians are trying to see what's going to work best. He has an appt next week with the main guy, so here's hoping with finger's crossed.

I'm still getting used to the whole blogging thing. BTW, does anyone know what the H E double hockey sticks Blog means????

My first time blogging

I guess it's about time I jumped in on this blogging bandwagon, so here I go..



Today, I'm thinking about my father. I'll be 50 years old this year, and he just turned 70 in February. I'm an only child, and am still very close to both of my parents. However, Daddy is in failing health and I can't seem to get any kind of answer (nor can he) from his Dr's as to what his prognosis is. The problem is I think he might be dying, and as his daughter, I simply want his last days on this earth to be as comfortable as possible, and I don't know quite how to go about helping him. He's starting to get easily confused and very forgetful, so I'm not sure what his drs are telling him. I've left messages for them to call me and hope to hear from them soon.



We'll see.